All I can Say Is Life will Find A way!......

All I can Say Is Life will Find A way!......

Hai you ok? You seem really down, what happen!?

Well it just….. I don’t know……. Its kind of……. You know……… I think………. I should……Hmm

That explains a lot, are you ok with all that? Or is there something you should handle. Well …..we could you know…..!

                        Ya I know we are a team but it just…..hmmm

Let’s take this one thing at a time, Who is our target?

                        Me

Ok who are we with

                        Me

Whose fault is it

                                Mine

And you are blaming yourself for what again

                                For being me

You think that bad. My dear didi, You are unique. The sweetest most beautiful thing anyone can ever have my dear dear sister. Now please smile… you are starting your second year in college tomorrow and this is what you are going with hasn’t you first year taught you any thing…

Did you know that the word of ‘didi’ is an actual a reference to an elder sister and you are calling your younger sister an elder sister, that is really bad you need help, have you consulted anyone

There we go there is that annoying little brat that grew up with me. Now tell me what is wrong I meant what is it that got into your head and is driving you crazy, mmm.. I mean Crazier. You look like some lame kid how just lost a fight!

Oh my God that it isn’t it…..
What happen this time!......?

It was easy wasn’t it, telling me that I am unique, that it ok to be you, that you have to first love yourself and all that philosophy. I am having a really hard time believing all that. Well in my case I am sure that it’s all wrong. I just give up I am a total loser

Oh come on you can’t be serious! Every….

                       Yes I am

Every one has issues

Well then how come no one is there for me when I need a friend and I have to be there when everyone needs someone

How asked you to be You don’t…

Because if I don’t go in myself I will always be left alone.

Look I am sorry I shouted. But it’s not easy ok I am not like you have at least one friend how cares. All I have is…. Never mind

Go on we will deal with it let it go ugly.

I try and remember every birthday I can I try to make it as special as I can for them some do remember keep status call and all that but there is not bonding there I mean I am just getting hollow wishes the ones I share with that I try to make it extra special, most of them forget, some of them don’t even do what they do for all their friend It just really alone. I can expect at least what she gives all their friends I can I least expect that. The ones I thought were really special can’t meet me can’t talk to me can’t call me to there house can’t come over here. All I do is do things for them I don’t have anything when I need it, even normal small talk is too much to ask. I am alone if I charge in on anything I get the responsibility praises and all. Even sometimes I even get asked to do thing, not because they know I can because they want it. If I don’t start a conversation I get to sit alone till some one want something to be done otherwise I am invisible. No one can do anything for me but I am supposed to do everything they think they want in the order they want. I am exhausted I don’t want friends that need my help I want one that like sit with me without me asking them or start a conversation once in a while. I can build impression with someone and make them believe that I am good at stuff, That yes I am! But I don’t know what I am anymore

Please don’t give me that rediscover yourself by doing what you love crap. I am way over all that. All I am is a lost person that is seriously damaged and will be left alone if don’t connecting myself and stay connecting. Have to remind my birthday to most I have to invite myself to parties I have to be some all-knowing The One to be noticed. What do normal people how have fun feel like how do they bond I really don’t get it why am I living, What am I doing with my life.

Well that is a lot on your plate, Know You have trouble finding friends, the ones you trust and like just have a creamy toping kind of bond what you do for them is not what you get back, they hardly remember and what they do is kind of robotic. The once you are ok with do what they can, well there best, that is what hold you from going bad

I get it Friends are a big issue. Look You have trouble with relationships and I have my studying issues. You know how terrible I am at it. You saw this is all to it in the same way I say it ok you will find a good friend one day how will be as crazzzzy as you are and find time for you and all that. It not going to be easy Life is never easy, Straight Roads never get you anywhere where you are strong rewarded and make you feel like you deserve it. All you can do is move on with you head held high learn what you can along the way. You will learn slowly, you will change. It’s ok people change with time, that is called growing. When you grow out of  pot you get planted in the ground it still hard

So the whole point is to move forward keep growing and be Really Really Really optimistic Isn’t just extortion. Why do people love life then

Why do you think people have dreams….

            Mikky didi dinner’s ready

Yap I am starving

                        Hai…….. thanks!

Aren’t you coming or are you going to sit there….. It ok you know, I can finish your desert for you

What’s that smile about!...?

I guess, even if you don’t gave the same person for every sitation you get at least one person in every situation….Maybe