Trust

Trust

            I am talking to you right now after breaking someone’s trust so, please don’t do it. I love this person so much that when tears flew out from her I felt like dying. It felt like my heart was bleeding. I chose to tell her a lie under the influence of a situation and I told her the truth after a while because I thought our relationship should not get built on that lie. But the truth was too heavy that it broke the hearth. Well luckily for me I got forgive but still it is burden that I hurt someone’s feeling for me there care for me.

So to everyone how have someone how trusts you how cares for you don’t let any misfires happen. Even for the right reasons. Every mistake is a mistake no matter how you much you ttry to justify them it is not when you get over them that you win it is when you learn to accept them as they are; that is when you really win.

For me I know I did the wrong thing for many right reasons. I should have dealt the situation with more maturity than with emotion. I hurt some feelings though they are forgive I have win back the trust I destroyed. Well I know one thing from my experience don’t take decisions if you are not ready to handle the consequences and after effects. I will try and try more and more till I win it and more back.

One other thing I did is; I took a Decision!

“I will never lie Again!” This Promise is to honor the trust that many have in me. I never break a promise unless unjust happens because of it.

I Got to Make a Wish!....

I Got to Make a Wish!....

            Last night in my sleep I saw a dream. An angel came and told me, “You are going to die now but your life deeds’ energy can be collected together to grant you one wish. Make a wish and dies with a peaceful mind.”

                        I thought to myself since I am dying maybe I should wish something for my family, that the gap made by me going will be filled. Then I thought that is selfish. I should, may be wish for something more. Like may be, Well timed weather changes; rain at the right time. Sun warmth everything.
Then I that was there we just made it worse, hmm “What should I wish for????......”

            Then it hit me. #Ting, #light bulb.

            I wish all the energy from my deeds be converted into an Angel that physically acts and that to visibly. Not the invisible kind of thing the physical magical powerful interference. I want him to defend the tortured, be the hand for the once light at hand. Be the feet to the once unable to stand. He should support the week and guard the noble and helpless.
Where the world fails to give justice, he should execute justice at Gods will.

            “Let’s take a walk by the river side with bank that have really soft grass and the river being so clear you can see the life in  it.” said the angel. I smile and said, “Where is the river, there is only this really bright light all around me.” The next second I was beside a beautiful river beside it beautiful greenery. I smiled and we walked.

            The breeze was soft and cool. It had a sweet smell of flowers. We walked for a while, talked nothing, and just kept walking. After a while, I saw a pretty large rock sat down on it with my feet dipped in water. Still the angel was silent.

            Then the angel asked what are you thinking about; I said, “What I had did, what I could have done, all my mistakes little good I did, mm I guess that’s it.”

The angel said “…and what did conjure from that thought?”

“I have wasted a lot of time, have made a bit of difference in a few lives. Still it feels like I could have done a lot better, I wished for such an angel because I dreamed of being such a human. I wished I had more time but I had all the time in the world. I didn’t commit good enough I didn’t do enough. I learned a lot shared some of it but only a few got a hold of it, at least in the proper sense. For all the good I have done I have way more flaws on the other side. Honestly I am confused. I don’t know what I did with my life!”

The angel replied with a question, “is this place beautiful?”

I said, “ Yes! It’s kind of a place I wanted to be in all day long for every day in my life”

One word for that is ‘Lazy’. Mm I guess he was right. I was so fed up with myself my dreams and all that I was doing and all that I have done and all that I wanted to do that I wanted time to come to a stand-still. Well so I guess you can say I am a bit lazy.

He continued, “Why is this place so beautiful to you?”, and I had no answer. So I just stared at him, with my eye brows up. He said “You see this place as beautiful as it is because you made this happen you want it to be beautiful”

As stunned as you are now, I just kept staring at him. “You do realize that this is happening inside your head, and when I described it to you, you guessed and imagined it to be beautiful, that is why it is. It is beautiful because you want it to be, you made it to be”

I guess he is right the world is a beautiful place but out of all the stress and the negative feeling that you have you don’t see the beauty of it you just see the negative. What we know is what we understand from what happens in front of us, even what we learn from our experience is centered around that.

Have an investigating attitude and happy thoughts to help then you learn more and more properly that is what I think

Well our conversation continued I asked, “Ok angel if that is so then what do you expect us to do?” His reply was strange and but sensible; “Do you really want me to answer that?” We always ask what how etc etc. We always want to be told what to do.

The reason is simple you have, I mean we have fear of failure. If it fails the blame should not come on me It is a s simple as that. If it is successful “I did it! Thank you for your support”. If not then, “I didn’t want this they told me to do it that is why I did it. It’s not my fault Ask them”

            “Mmm but why is the angel telling this to a man how is going to die, Why am I being reminded of what I did with my life” I thought to myself. I swallowed the question and asked, “What happen to my wish why are you we here talking; shouldn’t I be dying?”

            “You can’t wish for what every human being already is, always was!” and he was gone. Now it is my job, I mean our job to do what that angel in the wish would have done.

Being there…….

The Road That Leads Us On!!!...

The Road That Leads Us On!!!...

            I am definitely not the first person to say life is road that has junctions with infinite ways to go at each and every point. Each road that at each junction leads us to, destinies as everyone will love to call it, one road at every junction will lead to the same point but the impacts of these are always different. Take this example for instance; a boy decides to start writing.  The time and effort he has to put in at different points of life to reach a point of excellence is different at different junctions but the result is the same.

            What I meant to say in short is it is never too late to start and it is definitely never too late to try something now. it is not every morning that you will wake up with a calling to do something and you happen to excel in it and you are happy with what you do. You will have a fair share of failures and dips along the road. So what the hell! These so called failures are never failures till you decide and you convince yourself that it was a total waste of time.

            You didn’t get what I meant did you! That part that what you when through is not a failure till you are convinced that it is a total waste of time.

To keep it really simple, this is it; you are not a non-social thing that will only do what you want to do and is isolated from everyone and anything that can or already is happening. You have friends, family strangers that you see and might talk to, colleagues, business acquaintance, or maybe you are a teacher and you have stents you have to handle emotions and other issues. You deal with all these on a daily basis you are going to need a lot of experience. What you went through is just a tutorial so that you will know exactly how to help them.

            Now you know what to do with your so called failure or as I like to call them helper’s training now let’s see what we are doing and can do on this road trip.

If each second is a junction with infinite possibilities and as I have said earlier I am not the first person to say this, then that means you already know this. Why on earth are you repeating a tightly scheduled life, which you are frustrated about and not yet reached pleasant spot where what you love is what you do what you do is worth your life time and you have really lived it.

             We live a cycle that keeps spinning that we made and compline about it. Know what is to be done but not exactly doing what has to be done. To live your dreams you have to start doing what you see in them because unless you do nothing ever happens. If nothing ever happens the cycle is never broken if the cycle in never broken then you know where it will lead you.

            Consider that you are lost and that happen when you took a left a junction. When you get back to that same junction unless you take another road you will keep going around in circles. To be frank that is what I did for a while. And trust me when I say there is a tendency to get back into a loop every time I get to make a decision. But then I realize I need to set myself to find time to do what I love so that when I try to set a financially sound future, I do get to Live it with a peace of mind and happy smile; not the fake ones.

You know, as you have heard it many times if you love someone enough you will find time for them. The same goes with dreams. Unless you love them enough you will never find enough time to do them unless you find time for them you will never do anything. Unless you do something you will never be able have them as a part of your life.

            A life without these dreams means that you have never lived your life you have just been there. If being there is all you need then you will always find time to think about one thing and never find the answer to; ‘How do they do it?’

            But just because you do everything doesn’t mean you are going to find the right path really fast you have to patiently try an try and try till you can explain to anyone else why you can’t to it and convince them. Be that idiot that will try one more time after you have failed many times because every man or woman out there is that same idiot.

            If you are going to say that you don’t know where to start and that you have a lot of responsibilities here is a kick starter make list of thing you ever wanted to do. Try them one at a time again and again. Find time for this along with your daily activities as if you really love them you will find time for all of them. Your dreams need not be your calling they might be just like pressure cooker nozzles. But a calling is something that will drive you wanting to do more and more with your life . when you feel that calling you won’t stop for answers from other you will leave great tales for other to fallow even without yourself  knowing.

             So try to live your life rather than be in them. Try to live your dreams than just see them. Try to find that calling instead of just thinking of what might happen and how others are doing it. Besides all everyone is doing is trying.